The Curse of the Stupid People

I must be a bloody genius.

As immodest as that may sound, all the evidence points in that direction. The only rational conclusion I can reach is that, on a mean curve, I must be among the brilliant people on the planet because other people are so d*am stupid!

Case in point: I am staying at a hotel in Arkansas. (“Aha,” I hear you say, “the results are already skewed!“). The bathroom shower is graced with a plastic curtain on a rod, and next to that is a sign that reads “When showering, please close curtain.” And just to emphasize the point, there is a pictogram of a person showering with the curtain open, and a red slash through it. Well, thank goodness they took the time to write out the sentence (in English and Spanish, I might add); otherwise, I might have thought that showers were forbidden!

But just think about this for a moment. Not only are people so stupid that the hotel management feels compelled to tell us to close the  curtain while showering, but the very fact that they went through all the trouble of making those signs means that it probably happened!

I assume that, when I checked in last night, the clerk did not size me up and think “Hmm, better give him the room with the sign about closing the shower curtain.” Rather, it is safe to assume that such signs exist in every bathroom in the hotel. Which means, at some point, someone neglected to close the curtain while showering, stepped out of the shower and into a puddle of water, looked back at the shower, spied the curtain, and thought “Huh?”

So to my fellow geniuses out there, the ones who think of closing the shower curtain without the use of visual aids: what other signs have you seen lately that show just how awfully smart you must be?